DISPENSABLE

never get too comfortable in the sugar world. "hope for the best, prepare for the worst" is probably the best saying that could be linked up to this lifestyle. i am writing this post because (1) i'm sick with a cold :( and bored, and (2) have been on the edge on what the deal is with Single and me.

he told me last week he would call me on a thursday and i never heard from him. 2 days later i texted him (via my google voice account of course) asking what was going on with him and that i needed to know if we were meeting again or not so i could know what my next move should be. he texted back saying his flight the day he was suppose to call me got cancelled or something, and that he would call me soon. he did call me sunday night and told me he was going to look into destinations we could go to this month and then said he would call me the following night. well, he didn’t call once again (um -strike 2) but did text me the next day saying he requested off work, but for different days we had previously discussed on sunday night. i texted back saying i could only do the nights we originally planned and not the nights he was now suggesting. never heard back from him.
its not typical of him to be so in-and-out of touch and not call when he says he is. so i'm basically buckling up for the boot. am i sad? NOPE. angry? EH. annoyed? YEAH (fucking Xmas is right around the corner people!). right now though i'm more just like "what the hell?". if i don’t hear from him by friday i am going to once again text him and tell him either we plan a set trip now or i need to move on to someone more prompt. if you're wondering, i have absolutely NO emotions tied to Single... and this is why: (now i know i am probably writing this post a little early... for Single could call me tonight for all i know and tell me where and when we're meeting and for me to book my flight) but then again he could not, and when this happens you should never take it by surprise. arrangements are never permanent (unless you get married though i guess...weird) and when things like "love" and "he has my heart all bottled up in a diamond encrusted jar" start appearing i'm just not buying it. if there's love involved, it ain't no arrangement! now this is all my opinion (which i think all the sugar world "facts" are based on, just that -sheer opinion) so of course there will be people who refute what i am saying. but once again, it’s an opinion. so to carry on a bit more, when the "A" word is getting replaced by the "L" word then it's time to do the kaput.. or at least stop calling it an arrangement.
i have said it before though, i am a very unromantic, not swayed by cheesy love shit, type of girl (i swear i'm not a pessimist! lol). eventually i may be more in touch with my romantic side, but at this point in my life i want to keep my sugar daddy and my love/college life 2 separate things. if you're looking for a boy friend, go out and mingle with your own age crowd. if you want a sugar daddy, hit up SA.
thank goodness i have been remaining on the sugar site though. because i at least have another Pot already on my radar who i will possibly be meeting when i return to my hometown for the holidays. as many of us say, don’t put all your eggs in one basket! which i sure as hell have not and at this point never will *knocking on wood* lol. will keep yall posted on Single though. i'm keeping my fingers crossed because he really is quite a good catch sugar-wise and I would hate it going south before i even get any Xmas goodies -hmph x3

YEAH MON

its been a few days since i returned back from Jamaica with MrSingle. i usually try to be more discreet about the exact whereabouts of where i travel to but at this point i really am not too concerned about Single finding my blog as there is a plethora of other blogs he would have to sift through first. we spent 3 days doing our normal routine of sun basking, drinking excessively, dining out, and interacting with the local hot spots. i also went snorkeling and got a pedicure once again at the spa (no massage though so was kind of bummed about that). when i first landed in Jamaica and was going through customs Single and i were giving this woman our slips of customs papers. now this woman had the most bored/mad face on the whole time... then when she asked me if i was with Single and i said yes she got the biggest shit-eating grin on her face OMG, giving me that "i know what youre up to" look haha -needless to say at this point im unphased by it, for the most part, and it still makes for a good laugh. i just wish i could be like "yep honey keep judging because when im flying out of this place $3000 richer we'll see who's laughing" :)
anywho, we stayed at an all-inclusive resort that was amazingly nice. it was located about 20minutes from the airport and with the one fee Single paid it included all of our (many) drinks and food items. it had 3 restaurants we dined at: Japanese, surf&turf, and Italian, with them overall being quite yummy. surprisingly, we did not end up having sex AT ALL... the first night being i was still on my period, the second night because i drank so much i passed out cold when we got to the room and Single said he couldn’t get me to wake up again, and the third night because Single got quite sick possibly from a food or drink item and he couldn’t stomach doing anything vigorous lol. i still am a bit concerned about it for the fact sex is a big part of an arrangement but neither him nor i mentioned anything about it. overall it was a lovely time and i received my proper allowance and got a few cute souvenirs that i'll have to make up an excuse for, considering my real life friends know i have never been to Jamaica before. i am going to wait to see when Single contacts me again. i told him i wanted to do Vegas for our December meet and im crossing my fingers it all follows through.

my real life at this time is going great. i took a trip recently to do networking for my future career and feel very on-track with my life and where i want to go with it upon graduating college. i also continue to wonder how long i plan on remaining in the sugar world. since i don’t even want to get married until 30 it is quite feasible that i will be a SB for a few more years, or until i find someone i see myself being with for a very, very long time (aka. marriage-material) which i do not plan on finding anytime soon. i am continuing being on the sites and told Single i am still "curious" as to who is on it and he seemed unshaken by it so it kind of alleviated any nerves about his reaction if he did see i was continuing to log onto my account. until next time! x3

HI BYE



just writing a quick little post to say hello to everyone (and put off studying for my exam a bit longer lol). school is crazy as of now but i am super excited for mine and MrSingles next trip... we're going to an awesome island in the Caribbean areas!! finally i get to go on one of those highly sought sugar trips all of us SBs fantasize about! i am back on a sugar site though trying to find a man that can offer me everything Single is thus far.. but also who i am more physically attracted to. now like i said, MrSingle is not hideous by any means but knowng him and i will be intimate on every trip/meet kind of puts a downer on the whole grandiose of traveling to all these amazing places. i think now that i am nearing my 1 year mark being a SB (holy shit where does time go?!?!) i can find that absolute IDEAL SD that gives me an allowance, gifts, takes me traveling, and is someone i find physically/mentally attractive. as of now though i am overall satisfied with Single.. though it does sometimes feel like prying a friggin' tooth out when i try to up my allowance (it's now at the 3k mark). just missing writing posts so thats it for now! will let you ladies (and maybe some gents?) know how my trip goes in a few weeks x3

GRR

kind of irritated. no big deal just small things all happening at once that are making me slightly annoyed. well to first start off, my second trip with MrSingle went well. i received my full monthly allowance (upped it another $500) but we never got around to the shopping part of the trip so i'm still empty-handed in a few aspects. the hotel we stayed at was VERY nice and is VERY well-known... actually really reminded me of a hotel i stayed at when i saw MrLawyer a while back. so now on to why im annoyed:
1) MrSingle and i are trying to plan our next meet and he still has yet to get back to me about his schedule and whether we can do it (um if he says we cannot meet due to his schedule, he better still give me my full allowance amount or there will be problems). we're suppose to go to an awesome destination too for this meet so im going to be very dissappointed if things do not follow through as i hope them to.
2) the pot i flaked on continues to e-mail me. leave me the fuck alone! he sent me an e-mail that i took offense to so i called him out on it then told him to take care (aka. fuck off was what i was really thinking). i checked my inbox and he replied back with 2 e-mails basically saying thanks for wasting both of our times, etc etc. omg go awayyyy.
3) i finally had sex with a guy who goes to my school who i have been hanging out with for a bit. now dont get me wrong - im not looking for a boyfriend by any means right now but he always texted me seeing what i was up to, etc. on an every day basis. well now that we screwed, about 4 days ago, i havent heard from him (so not typical). so i decided i would call him out on it this morning via text (in a jokingly, make it seem like i'm-cool-with-it-but-not-really kind of way). he responded back promptly saying he has been extremely busy and knows that isnt an excuse. i laughed it off and made a little joke as a response and well... i sent that about 20minutes ago, and have i gotten a response back yet? -nope. [EDIT: just texted me back lol. okay, so what - i'm a little impatient. but still not cool to go m.i.a. right after we screw :)]

SO TO SUM THIS POST UP:

FOR NOW... LOL x3

SB FLAKER

yep, i am guilty of being that thing us SBs despise -a flake *bom bom bommmm*. the pot i mentioned in the end P.S. note on my last post, and i were suppose to meet for lunch this past Friday afternoon. well after a night of partying and ending up at my OpenRelationshipBoyfriend's place (now officially my ex boyfriend) and sleeping through my 10a.m. alarm, the meet did not happen. i checked my Google Voice account to see a text and voicemail from the pot basically saying how rude i am for making him drive almost 2 hours before he realized i wasn't showing for our planned lunch... this being quite understandable hehe. i IMed him via AOL messenger and explained, or shall i say, bull shitted to him how "i lost my cell phone... i'm so sorry... i understand him being irritated". he tried convincing me to make a trip out to his hotel for the night to make it up to him. no thank you. he is quite attractive though and very set on being a SD so if any of yall want his info let me know! haha -hoping i won't get any bad sugar karma for flaking out on him but at the same time i still have MrSingle :) who i will be meeting for the second time this weekend. we have a set shopping goal to obtain for me he said - goody!
x3

TRIPLE THREAT

introducing MrSingle everyone! as you all know i have been on the hunt for a replica of MrLawyer but without the whole um -married thing. three posts ago i briefly mentioned i was exchanging communication with a new promising pot that was single aka. MrSingle. after e-mailing and talking over the phone i booked my trip to meet him finally at an awesome city everyone is familiar with. it was a bit nerve-wracking doing this because i put all the charges on my card when i barely even knew the guy but i had a good gut feeling about him and he reimbursed me right away like promised. it felt very undercover flying out of the city my university is located in, since this is the first time i have had a sugar life while being in school at the same time.
MrSingles flight came in much later than expected which was all for the best considering i partied hard the night before my early-morning departure and packed an hour before leaving. when i arrived in the city of meeting i took a nap, showered, and prettied myself up for the first face-to-face meet with MrSingle. while lounging on the beach he finally arrived and he looked just like his picture. now he is not the hottest star in the sky but he is cute in a nerdy, down to earth, UNmarried kind of way :p we got to know one another and before readying for dinner he wanted to give me my allowance and reimbursement for my flight/hotel i had previously put on my own card -he definitely got extra points for that.
the meal was muy delicioso and was accompanied by a lot of wine. at first i'll admit i felt a bit nervous or ancy (not too sure what it was) sitting across from this potential SD, knowing my friends at my unviersity were living their typical college lives/partying. it made me wonder some if this was what i truely wanted and if i was missing out on my college years at all by leaving it behind for a weekend (and soon to be one weekend every month). we were at the restaurant for almost 4hours and afterwards went to our seperate rooms to catch up on much needed sleep with him asking no questions about me not wanting to sleep with him.
the next day involved lounging on the beach basically all day, sipping on mixed drinks, then once again getting ready for dinner ANDDDD shopping!! now this is only the second time really a SD has taken me shopping (my first time being with LatinLover ages ago). all in all he spent about $600 on items i got -mostly clothes and beachwear. dinner was lovely once again and i got a nice little buzz from my amazing wine.
we went back to the hotel and he gave me another gift he bought for me prior to the trip, a beautiful, simple yet classy, piece of jewelry. we had sex afterwards.. not too bad -i didnt come or anything but he was happy and so was i from the previous events.
our plan is to meet once a month in a different exotic location every time for the weekend. he said he would like to get me some type of gift every time he sees me and also said he will give me a 2-3k allowance. so essentially i have found my triple threat: gift, travel, AND allowance daddy! i have yet to read Leidra Lawsons book but i do recall that this is the ideal daddy to have correct? sweet!
also, MrLawyer and i are still in contact but have both come to the conclusion that we are nearing the end of our arrangement (he actually even said he has been having some guilt about the whole situation so once again him and i are on the same page). this is of course impeccable timing considering how well my meet with MrSingle went. MrLawyer said he will still give me my full allowance amount for the month of August and possibly also for September/October since he has always promised he will not cut me off without giving me fair prior knowledge. next time he asks what my schedule is like i will finally tell him i do not see us getting together again and then he can decide how much more money (if any) he wants to give me. looks like things have taken a full turn-around ever since my post about ORB (him and i are on good terms again but are officially NOT an item any longer). oh the beauty of life x3

ps- there is still one other pot i have been e-mailing prior to my meet with MrSingle. he is possibly going to fly to my city of living for a meet and greet (dinner and possibly breakfast next day). no effort needed from me for this so might as well follow through with it and see if anything $good$ can come from it.

YOUTUBE

-interesting short video about S.A. and some opinions and debate about this lifestyle. i am very happy to see that the majority of comments below the videos on YouTube are actually quite positive/supportive of this lifestyle - cheers to freedom of choice!
(p.s.- that lawyer woman in the part II video is a friggin hag; she's probably one of the CraigsList prudes that monitors our sugar posts and removes them hahaha)

PART I
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uepaE-r1c2Q&feature=related
PART II
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzzbpm1rGkI&feature=related


enjoy! x3

SO SAD

*sigh* the day i was hoping would never come happened yesterday. throughout my posts i have always mentioned my "open relationship bf" ("ORB") and have always been back and forth about what i want with him. though this has to deal a lot with my personal life (something i dont like to blog about much) i feel like it directly ties in with my sugar life. this being because i have always had to carefully balance my schedule, life, and... well -lies to keep both my "ORB" and any SDs. unfortunately these two parts of my life collided yesterday.

i left my cell phone at "ORB"s house. in a nut shell, he went through my phone and saw numerous text messages between MrLawyer and me, mainly discussing him depositing money into my account. i ended up meeting "ORB" to get my phone. so awkward.. we were in a public place luckily so there was no yelling or overt emotional reactions but it was like a nightmare coming true having my "ORB" know so much information about a man, MrLawyer, that is a part of my sugar life.. the life i didnt ever want colliding with my real life, especially the part of my real life that has to do with someone i truely love and care about so, so much! ORB told me he actually called MrLawyer too!!.. calling him awful names and basically told him what a fucked up person he is for giving me money to 'have sex with him'. i attempted to alleviate the situation by saying i just get money for going out to dinner with MrLawyer and listening to his problems. a lie - yes. so many lies with this lifestyle! it makes me wonder if its worth it! then you get that huge wad of cash in your hands and its soooo worth it. right? i have too many people i care about in my life and lying to them about this lifestyle is just getting to me i think. and now that my "ORB" knows i feel like i hit rock bottom.
i called MrLawyer after "ORB" and i parted ways (still unsure what is going to happen between us) and apologized for ORB calling him and being so mean. he was very understanding but im still unsure what is going to happen with Lawyer and me too.. though the original plan of replacing him with an UNmarried SD is still in progress.
is it truely possible to have someone you love so very much AND a SD?.. im thinking for me personally -no. just a very, very shitty time right now. ThisTooShallPass. x3

LET YOUR CONSCIENCE BE YOUR GUIDE

i made a very impromptu visit to see MrRocker last week (first SD i ever met from the sites). it was just a casual get-together.. in my mind i knew there would be no sex or anything, considering we're more of friends and not in an arrangement. when we were laying out pool-side we started talking about an interesting topic: SDs of course.. lol. he asked me if i was still involved in being a SB. me being a bit inebriated at this point, i told him basically all about my arrangement with Lawyer and how he's married. welllll, MrRocker was rather shocked i had involved myself with a married man. he went into this long spiel about how he had seen girls like me get involved with those type of men at my age and then he meets them 5+ years later and they despise men now, this being because they saw/see what pigs these men are - they have committed themselves to their wife but fuck younger women behind her back. it kind of hit a soft spot in me when he told me this.. and ever since i have been on the hunt now for MrLawyer MINUS the wifey!
i know i want to truely be able to love a man in the future and be 110% confident he loves me just as much. i'd be the 30-something year old wife and i dont want to have to worry about my husband fucking some 20-something year old when he's away on "business". so the search is in full force now and i already have a great pot! :) no details now about him until its fully established we will meet. he's single though, that i will say, and seems very, very generous!
and on a random note - aother guy i was e-mailing from one of the sites offered to give me money via PayPal to prove that he's "serious/real". okay, well he sends me the money (a little over $300) and POOF! lmao like really? hey i mean im not complaining because i basically got money for nothing but so strange it was that he gives me money then stops e-mailing.. whatever though more $ to add to the sugar pot ;) x3

ps- ladies please dont think i am trying to criticise anyone for being with a married man! they are definitely the better prospects for serious SDs (like i've written in a past post)... i just have a guilt problem i guess and am too firm a believer in karma to do it myself at this time in my life. maybe i'll end up with another married man again one of these days... who ever knows in the world of sugarrr x3

THE USUAL

got back from another meet with MrLawyer today. i felt so tired the whole time i was meeting with him... no idea why. maybe from all the traveling and lying? *sigh* im ready to be back living on my own again - it can be exhausting having to lie to the people u love, family, for this lifestyle. also still trying to keep it on the down low from my "open relationship bf" has been putting a strain on my conscience. anywho, it all comes with the game of being a SB i guess.
the hotel room Lawyer put me in was fabulous! easily one of the nicest hotels ive ever stayed at. he gave me the rest of my month's allowance so i guess we're on a 1/2 pay per meet and 1/2 advanced allowance payments to my account. whatever - money is money honeys! ;) we also finally discussed and clarified that he has no jealousy or issues with me continuing logging onto my SB account. i love that him and i are able to be so open about things that have to do with our SD/SB arrangement without feeling weird. i mean lets be honest... the words "sugar daddy" and "sugar baby" sounds soooo much better being typed in a blog rather than you sitting there telling a man "Well youre my sugar daddy and im your sugar baby!" kinda awkward, no? so as of now things are laid out on the table for us both and our arrangement and my steady allowance is still in full force!
i also see that i now have 50 followers - YAY! so happy that people are so interested in finding out about being a SB from my perspective. i hope you all have learned a few things, been entertained, and gained more confidence about being a SB yourselves through my experiences. i would love for any of you to say hello through a comment on here, ask me any questions you may have, or tell me something u have enjoyed thus far in my posts :) beso beso beso x3

SD OR BF

MrLawyer and i have set up our next meeting finally. i received the full half of my allowance via my sugar bank account and my ticket is bought. he was going through a phase where he kept on bugging me about why i was still logging onto my sugar baby profile and i kept telling him he didnt need to worry and i am definitely not looking for a replacement for him (im really just looking for a 2nd SD hehe). i started feeling like i was dealing with a jealous boyfriend though! finally he apologized and the issue has been dropped... for now lol.
while i was logging on i did find a good pot. him and i actually had a meet planned for yesterday night, but he had to cancel it due to being stuck at the airport. i was a bit pissed considering i was already in my full face of make-up and spent a good while picking out an outfit. but honestly im glad it happened because i was sooooo exhausted from a weekend road trip i took with some girlfriends and i just didnt feel like my normal perky, conversing-self. we're rescheduling for next week and i will go into further details about him then if/when it happens.

how many of you girls consider your SD your boyfriend? in the past i have met a few men who were looking more for a real relationship with a SB rather than something strictly NSA. i would usually cut off contact with them once they shared that info just because i have been in the mind set lately where i only want a strict, typical SD/SB arrrangement. i just had a conversation though with my "open relationship real bf" and we finally had the talk ive been putting off for a while - basically it consisted of us both admitting that our ties with eachother are finally going to have to be completely cut off the end of this year since he is graduated now and i am going to remain in school for a couple more years. it was so sad to finally admit to myself and thus far ive had my cake and eaten it too (bf to say "i love you", sugar daddy, no guilt since bf and i arent "official")... but looks like im on my last piece :/ so then it got me thinking about potentially being open to the idea of considering a SD a bf. i mean what girl wouldnt want a rich bf who can take care of her?... but it just feels like it could get super complicated getting emotionally invovled with a SD... ugh advice por favor?? x3

ps- the picture has nothing to do with this post... i just thought it was cute as hell! lol

GETTING TOO COMFORTABLE

i'm scanning through all of my past posts and its starting to make me miss going out on dates with potentials! i think i may be getting too comfortable with MrLawyer anyways and being too exclusive to him. i need to find a hot, young SD who lives in miami or something! ;p
x3

SO YOU TALKED THE BIG 'A'

....now what? since mine and MrLawyers meet got postponed due to unexpected commitments on his part, i'm going to write a quick little, my p.o.v., post on asking for and getting a dependable and consistent ALLOWANCE!.... which ultimately is the main reason why 99% of us SBs decide to even take on the sugar world.
i am finally in the situation where i am now receiving monthly payments from my SD. even now though, there are still questions to be answered which is just a given when u are dealing with 2 people from completely different worlds and *ahem* age groups. the main quality to look for in a pot who can be dependable for a constant allowance is usually the (A) married man or (B) pot who gives u cash on the very first meet. i say this because when meeting MrLawyer he gave me $400 for just having lunch with him (and yes he is married too). the only other time i have received money on a first meet was from TheRussian, another married man.

so once u have seen if the pot is very generous financially and u have decided yall are compatible enough, the next step is to ask for that ideal amount u expect from an arrangement with him. if the man is familiar with the SD/SB concept then usually he is the one who first brings this convo up. if he does not and u have continued to see him for 2-3 meets u MUST have this talk otherwise u are risking allowing too much time to pass by, enabling the SD to assume he does not have to pay up which is a bigggg NO-NO! since this is naturally a very awkward conversation, a nice little e-mail bringing up the topic is appropriate.
if the SD right away acts flustered and makes u feel like u are being rude or unfair for even bringing the 'A-word' up... DROP HIM! i mean ppl may have different opinions and may say i'm being too harsh but this is my opinion: there are sooooo many SDs out there more than willing and capable to pay u a monthly allowance why even deal with a guy who is going to make the process difficult and even more awkward??? exactly.

when deciding an amount to ask, Sarah Sugarbaby gave me good advice saying total up all your bills, financial obligations, etc. and double that number to decide your amount. being a SB is about being able to spend money without worries so u want more than just what u need - u need some spending money for the important things like shopping and pedicures! lol.

if the SD obliges (which he should as long as u are not asking an exhorbitant amount) u then have to decide what will be the best way to receive your funds. experienced SDs will probably already have a way they are already comfortable with to do this. u should specify also whether u want all your amount upfront (like the 1st of the month), getting half in the beginning of the month and half near the end, or per meet payment. after talking it out with MrLawyer, he made me realize that receiving my month's allowance all up front on the 1st of every month is the best way to do it. that way if we can only see eachother once per month for whatever reason, i still get all my money.... compared to per meet where we may unexpectedly not see one another one month and i get screwed over bc i dont get all my money when i need/want it.

so now u have established the amount u want and when u will receive it, but now u have to figure out how u will actually go about getting the cash from his wallet to your bank account. at first MrLawyer and i did the whole he gives me cash every time we meet (pay per meet). recently though he suggested i set up a bank account so he can transfer funds to it at the first of every month. when he had to cancel on our meet i had already bought my plane ticket - so he put money to cover my unused ticket plus a little extra to cover my allowance even though we couldnt meet - perfection haha. usually the SD will have a preference of bank he can easily access to deposit funds. i ended up opening a new account at a bank i had never used in the past which is fine because i will only be using the account for my SB allowance and dont have to worry about my personal money being accessed or getting mixed up with the sugar cash : )

-i hope this helps somewhat! MrLawyer is my first dependable, real SD who gives me an allowance. but who knows.. maybe my opinion will change again. but as of now im getting the big-'A' so theres gotta be some facts to my opinion hehe x3

I'M RICH BITCH

...okay well i wouldnt go that far as to say im rich, but im a hell of a whole lot more stable monetary-wise after my 3rd meet with MrLawyer :) i flew out of state to meet him this time. once again i had my own hotel room which is sooo nice -i will always make this a must with any future SD from now on. its just nice to be able to go back to your own room and bathroom and wash your make-up off and sleep without having to worry about what u look like, etc ya know?
it was a VERY brief meeting that consisted of dinner, breakfast the next day, and of course doing the deed in between. i was actually really anxious about the whole thing and was worried i would possibly feel trashy or gross after i finally had sex with MrLawyer.. and guilty about him being married and all. but i didnt (dont know if that is bad or good or makes me an awful person?.. lol)! luckily he was only up to 1 round of bed wrestling, so i got to go back to my bed earlier than i anticipated. i wont say exactly how much i got as an allowance here.. but lets just say if this was a job i wouldve been paid over $160/hour and that INCLUDES the time i was sleeping haha.
so yeah -really brief meeting and i am defintely planning on trying to make this a long-term arrangement which will mean that MrLawyer could/will/is my first official SD! yay! dont want to jinx anything but as of now things are perfect so lets see where it all takes me x3

MR.LAWYERS VISIT PART II

*CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS POST* i text MrLawyer to let him know that i am going to stand my ground! as in i was not going to have sex with him. i went back and forth in my head telling myself that if i didnt do the deed then there was a high chance i would be leaving our 2nd meet empty handed.. which wouldve defeated the whole purpose of me taking time out of my schedule for him to fly to see me. it also would put me in the position that he would realize that i wasnt good potential to be his SB. but at the same time i know there are so many of u girls who have stood your ground until YOU felt comfortable about taking an arrangement to an intimate level and then reaped very sugary rewards for it. i knew that if MrLawyer was the right man to be my SD then he would respect my decision. so MrLawyer calls me and says that he is definitely dissapointed but still wanted to come to my room for a little making-out if i was okay with it. um yes duh.

when i awoke the next morning i sent him a text saying i was awake and would be ready to go to our planned brunch in an hour. no text back from him. hmmm... the thought that he booked an earlier flight early that morning and left me at the hotel because of my decision the night before passed through my mind. when i was done prettying up i went and knocked on his door. no answer. i pressed my ear to the door and heard running shower water so figured i would wait it out since he was obviously still in his room.

finally i receive a text from him as im sitting in my hotel room trying to occupy myself, saying he would knock on my door soon when he was finished getting ready. eventually he came and i drove us to the beautiful area the restaurant was at. it had an incredible view and most important, incredible food. i ordered a salad, entree, and extra side just so i would have left overs for a late lunch later too hehe. once again our conversation flowed and we just enjoyed eachothers presence. when we got back to the car so i could drop him off at the hotel before i departed, he reached over me to stick a wad of cash in my purse. as he did it he said he debated about even giving me it because of the afore mentioned situation.

when i dropped him off at the hotel and we bid our farewells he talked like the ball was in my court now to decide if we were to meet again. i was thinking 'well depending on the amount of money u just stuck in my purse it could be a yes..' lol.
when i counted the cash it only ended up being 500bucks. eh -i wasnt surprised... but i was expecting more and was hoping that MrLawyer was planning on giving me more too. i e-mailed him later to ask him if i had had sex with him if he would have/was planning on giving me more than $500. also, i said that if i was going to meet with him again and become intimate this time i would expect a minimum of a $1000/meet. he replied back saying yes he was planning on giving me more than $500 and that my asking amount was perfectly fine with him for the 3rd meet. sweet!.. and i guess i cant argue bc ultimately these things are about the sex and cash ..so i cant get my full share of cash if hes not getting the sex yet. right?
so now we are planning for our 3rd meet in the next 2 weeks hopefully. i am now comfortable (or as comfortable as u can be about having sex with a married 50-something yr old haha) with taking things to the next level with him this upcoming meet ..and then hopefully will be flying back home from it a much, MUCH richer woman ;) x3

MR.LAWYERS VISIT PART I

finally i get to blog about my meet with MrLawyer last week! things have been soooo hectic schedule-wise for me. mainly due to my hard as hell summer classes!! i finally decided today to buy myself out of it by paying a personal tutor to help me out.. made me realize how sweet it is to be able to use $$$ to buy your way out of stress. and now i have more time for SD-hunting and having a social life ;) though i believe i have found a great catch in MrLawyer...

he flew in last week late afternoon. not going to lie - i was much more nervous than usual about the meet but of course wasnt going to bail out once he had landed in my hometown! like discussed, i had my own hotel room separate from his. he scheduled 1 hour massages for us at a spa within walking distance of the hotel which definitely helped make me more comfortable... my masseuse was actually pretty hot and it was kinda funny to see MrLawyers expression when he noticed it too... jealousy? hehe. the masseuse hottie ended up being gay tho - figures lol.

after the massages we had time to kill before our dinner reservations. so i invited MrLawyer to come hang out in my hotel room (even tho i would have preferred taking a relaxing bath and nap) but he was there to spend time with me and in order to get the money and live-up to the MUTUAL aspect that comes from these type of 'relationships' u gotta do what u gotta do. we started making out and i kept telling him "not to get too frisky" since i thought we had established we werent taking things to the next level for this 2nd meet. *SCREEEEECH* "wait -you're not planning on having sex?" MrLawyer responds. uh oh.
i guess i hadnt been as clear as i thought about me not wanting to get intimate. i pointed out to him tho that his exact words to me when we were planning out this meet was "all you are obligated to do when im there is have dinner with me." luckily we put it on the back-burner since it was time to get ready for dinner.

dinner was.... eh. i was disappointed by the food actually and the bar tender was such an ass! i ordered a soda and MrLawyer ordered an alcoholic drink and we traded (since im not 21 and dont have a fake) and the bar tender completely called us out on it! after the fact it was actually hilarious and gave both of us a good laugh over dinner... though i did feel like there was a very hostile energy towards him and i throughout the whole meal.. prob due to the fact he is 35+ years my senior! ha.
after dinner, the topic of me not wanting to have sex came up again and we spent like over half an hour discussing it! and me explaining why i was making the decision to abstain from it for the 2nd meet. finally he said he had to check in with his wife and left my room and i was left to decide -was the money worth me breaking the promise i made to myself not to get intimate with him and to go against my my morals?
*WILL CONTINUE NEXT POST* x3

HOME SWEET HOME

i am officially back living at home now that i am done with my temporary job that started in Jan.. which was the same time i launched my SD search. within a 5 months span i have been lucky to not experience anything awful or crazy with pots by using my smarts and following my intuition... also i have gained some cash, experiences, gifts, and above all -knowledge with how these SD/SB arrangements are suppose to work. even so though, i have still YET to find a SD that i can consider a reliable, long-term source of monetary assistance and essentially someone i can call my SD.

at the same time i am awaiting MrLawyer's arrival this Wed... an SD who definitely knows how an arrangement is suppose to work and has great promise for becoming a long-term arrangement! im still anxious about being the hostess to a SD since in the past i have always been the one being hosted/seeing a SD in his city of living. as of now our plan is to have reflexology massages (look it up.. they sound amazing!) when he gets here then go out to dinner to a super nice restaurant in this area. im still conjuring up what i want us to do the day after. im leaning towards a fancy brunch and casual outing (arcade, aquarium, etc?). we will see! x3

ENDING OF THE BEGINNING

first of all i want to start off by saying im so sad that sarah has quit her blog! :'( i hope that if she decides to join us here again in SugarLand she will recount her ventures once again ... there is hope bc i feel like once u get a little taste of the sugar its hard to get rid of the sweet tooth for good -unless u get a wrench to pull the whole damn thing out!.. or fall in true love with a non-SD?

update for me right now: i am still completely D-O-N-E with LatinLover and MrDoolittle for reasons mentioned in last posts. i am hoping that i have finally found a pot that could truely become a long-term SD and finally free me of having to scour SD websites and go on dates with pots! (though those can be fun sometimes).

last post i was talking about how MrLawyer and i were having major issues trying to coincide our schedules in order to find a date that we could meet again. WELLLL he is much more into me than i thought i guess.. we were texting sometime last week and were realizing that our 2nd meet was just not going to happen as soon as we were originally planning. i was saying that i guess maybe later on in the months, if neither of us had found what we were looking for, we could reconnect again when our schedules were more free. he texts me back saying that he was surprised i was giving up so easily and asked me if i had found someone else?? lol -nooooo i havent. he wanted to talk on the phone to see if we could make something work. so now he is flying to come see me! this is my first experience with a SD flying out just so he can see me... i feel a little pressure about it -not gunna lie- and almost a little overwhelmed... but most of all excited that i seem to have found a SD that treats me higher than he sees himself and knows what the meaning of 'respect' is and a traditional SD/SB arrangement. hes flying in late-afternoon and then leaving afternoon the next day so i dont know how much time we have to kill... any of u ladies who have had a SD come to see u -what did u do?!? im low-maintenance when it comes to things to do and prefer casual, fun outings like bowling or arcades (cheesy i know lol) so should i suggest this? or should i ask to go shopping or to a spa? i dont know but i'd take either one!

we have already established that i will have my own hotel room so i dont have to drive home and back when he comes in but rather just stay at the same place -not room!- as him and he even said that he only goes to sleep and wakes up with one person (im assuming he was referring to his wife?) -which is FIIIINE with me :):)

im expecting him to give me some type of allowance money when he visits... at this point we have not discussed a specific amount i want every month. he asked me a # i expect and i told him i would count on his generosity rather than tell him a set amount.. I mean he did give me $400 our first meet so im not too worried in leaving the exact figure to him. also, this way i can test his generosity while also not saying a # that is lower than he may have intended. and if for some reason I am not satisfied with the amount he gives me than the bargaining of the big-'A' (allowance) can ensue x3

GETTING REAL

so a few posts ago, the one titled "FOR LOVE? OR MONEY?" i was contemplating staying in my hometown or going back to my school to take classes for the summer. well i've decided on staying in my hometown! ... my ex/"open relationship bf" just wasnt a good enough reason to go back to school a few months earlier than i was anticipating. im focusing on the sugar because like most of u girls will agree: im young, attractive, and in my prime time to get the most sugar possible so I cant be wasting time on one (young, non-SD) guy now! its going to be great because i'll be done working these ridiculous hours ive been having in *the city im currently living in* and actually have my weekends free... meaning more availability to meet with pots/SDs :)

i ended up meeting with MrDoolittle over the weekend for dinner. one word: "amazing".... and im referring to the meal NOT him... haha. we havent even had sex yet and 95% sure we never will because well -he sucks at being a SD! honestly he has no idea what an SD is and what an arrangement is suppose to consist of. i really only met up with him for the dinner bc it was a rare night that i didnt work until close and i had nothing else better to do -plus i had to cancel our prior dinner plans due to my car dilemma i mentioned in my last post... so why not hit up a "SD" (in quotes bc of what i just mentioned before) for a 4 course meal thats on him?..hehe.
DRINK: lemon drop martini - APPETIZER: spinach dip - SALAD: ceasar - ENTREE: center cut filet mignon w/ a loaded baked potato -DESSERT: belgium chocolate sundae. YUM!!
not surprisingly he didnt offer gas money or any type of monetary help when i was leaving. i dont know if it was because i said i had to go home right after dinner rather than "hanging out" at his place or if he figured the lavish meal was what consisted of the "spoiling" part of our "date"... he even had the naivety to say "I love spoiling you" as i was digging into the dessert sundae... and i just thought "WTF.. the dinner is not the spoiling part... ANY guy could buy me dinner!!.. its $$$/gifts thats 'spoiling'. fucking idiot." and i just continued gorging myself until i practically had to be roller to my car. its whatever tho -i didnt even kiss him afterwards and he's... nice? ha. awesome dinner tho... but like any smart SB would be saying after a guy like this: 'NEXT!'

im getting frustrated by the fact that MrLawyer and i have been having issues trying to find a good date both of us are free to meet again. my summer schedule has been all turned around due to me finding out my classes are starting much earlier than i anticipated and MrLawyer, for whatever reason, cannot meet on weekends. soooo moving on? maybe? *sigh* he is a great pot though :( maybe things will work out? i'll keep yall posted on it of course.. but as of now I have to continue my search to hopefully find someone more flexible before the summer starts! au revoir pretty ladies x3

FUCKERS

now that my anger has died down i can post. let me explain:
so the other night i was suppose to meet MrDoolittle when i got off work for dinner. i have not seen him in over a month since he left for a 2week out-of-the-country, get away. well when i get off work and start my car to drive home to begin getting ready... it would not start. GREEEEAT. so rather than getting prettied up and having a fab dinner i was already salivating over during the day, i had to sit in my job's parking lot for 3hours waiting for a tow truck to take my car to the nearest auto repair shop. of course i called MrDoolittle expalining to him the situation and would have to cancel our dinner plans... i even started my car (unsuccessfully) to prove it was not starting and that i wasnt bull shitting my car dilemma.
well come the next day -i get an estimate from the auto shop with how much it is going to be to fix my car. about $1200!!!! what the hell! at this point i was unsure if my parents were going to cover this grandiose cost - so whats a girl (whos a secret SB on the side) to do? -hit up her SDs of course. ..... heres where the anger part comes into play.

i text LatinLover and Mr Doolittle. LatinLover bc he is the only SD i have remained in contact with since coming to the city im currently living in. and Mr Doolittle bc he said over text the night before when my car wouldnt start that he "owes me 1 major spoiling". so get this shit: LatinLover says in reply (in a nutshell) that "hes dealing with fraud in his account and if it was any other week he would be more than happy to give me the money" (NOTE: i only asked for him to contribute 600 or 700 bucks to the 1200 i owed). fucking bull shit! ive said from the git-go that the stories that sometimes comes out of this guys mouth are hard for me to fully believe and this was the final fucking straw!! my response? "wow". and then he continues to text me, delving more into his (made-up!) situation and acting oblivious to the fact my "wow" meant: "wow... [i dont believe your lying, piece of shit, bull shit excuse]". not: "wow...[u poor thing what happened exactly?]" so now he is under my cell's contacts as "JOKE/IDIOT" -lol. i was debating about sending him a nasty text in response to his bull shit excuse for not wanting to help me... but like any good SB would do -i dont want to burn any bridges i might need to reach my final sugar destination :) so i left it at my "wow" and will fully ignore him, starting now.

MrDoolittles response was more along the lines of him saying he had his own mechanic guy who could look at it, and then asked me for all my cars details so he could get an estimate from this mechanic friend. well i havent heard from him since so i guess he's full of shit too about promising me "one big spoiling".

so what the hell is with these guys!!?!? i was seriously flabbergasted by how these idiots who go on sites to meet women -who they should know are in it sheerly for the cash- cant cough up fuckng $600 to help out a SB they have known for a while and has always been nice/appreciative towards them (i.e. ME!). so what gives? am i being too harsh in cutting LatinLover off? either way im done with him bc he is just fucking annoying when i hang out with him and i always feel almost guilty asking for anything monetary from him bc he just seems so cheap sometimes 
oh!... and the end result of my car dilemma was my parents paid for it *phew* but still -if i didnt have them i would seriously be sooooo screwed right now having to pay that much $$$ myself to get my car fixed.. something a SB should not have to worry her pretty little self about.
MrLawyer is still in the picture by the way -we are still trying to find a date where we can both meet in this specific city near us both... the thing is i dont know if we were to do that if he would assume we would need to have sex -and i am just not ready for that with him i dont think -considering we've only met once for lunch. x3

MATTER OVER MORALS

it seems that in the sugar world, the SDs that are most willing to be generous and stick to the NSA part that goes along with an arrangement seems to be... the married ones. yes, yes -once in a blue moon the guy who's young, attractive, and affluent will come along.. but honestly lets be real -the married guys is where the real sugar is at. theyre the ones who are the most willing to throw $$$ at young, pretty women for a chance to win them over and try to figure whats inside a 20-something year olds mind (and her pants haha). the question is though: do u put your morals on the back-burner in order to attain the matter/sugar/$$$/gifts/luxuries these wedded guys are willing to hash out? i just feel like i might be setting myself up for bad karma and paranoia with my own husband when i finally say "I do." is anyone on the same boat as me with this?
at this point i am in a conflicting situation. let me introduce MrLawyer (briefly, for the fact i have been mentioning men and then they never seem to come up again in any other posts bc well.. we just lose touch and i realize theyre not what i want from a SD. i.e. MrAll-Star).

MrLawyer and i met at a nice restaurant in the hotel he was staying at. he had contacted me before on the site and at our meet reminded me that i had initially blocked him after we exchanged a few e-mails (oopsy hehe). but had created another profile recently and decided to contact me 1 more time since he was coming into my city for business. i had an amazing salad, and then a salmon pasta dish that i took home for dinner that night *side note: i like to order a large, meatless salad to fill me up during an initial meet bc usually my nerves supress my appetitite anyways. but i order a lovely entree too. so by the time ithe entree comes i am always full already from my salad so i get to take the entree to-go and always end up with lunch AND dinner from one meet. maybe a bit tacky? oh well* so towards the end of our meals he tells me to reach my hand under the table to grad something from him. as i clasp my long fingers around what he is holding i feel a HUGE wad of cold, hard, cash. SWEET! he points out how i blushed when taking it bc i mean, it is a bit embrarrassing being handed money sometimes...but i'll just have to get over that :) we finally part and agree we enjoyed ourselves and he'll get in touch with me. i hurry off to the restroom to count the moolah and pull out lots and lots of $20's and altogether count $400. not too shabby for a first meet.

so ive come to the conclusion that the married men are the most generous (as of now i feel). TheRussian and MrLawyer both were married and both gave me money on our first meet. though TheRussian was a flake and pretty much played me (live n' learn) but im hoping i will be able to establish something more long-term with MrLawyer. we've been emailing to find a date when we are both free to meet again... he lives out of state so we'd have to fly... so until then i will update.and in the mean time i guess i will have to set aside my feelings of guilt for mingling around with a taken man and learn from them maybe what they are not getting from their wives that makes them turn to this lifestyle... so i dont do the same with my husband... if i ever even want to get married after living this SB secret lifestyle : /

ps- LatinLover and i are meeting saturday.. he has been the SD that i seem to have been having steady meets with and is becoming more of a friend-type of thing rather than a SD. kind of annoying but who doesnt need 1 more friend who sometimes takes her shopping and to shows and to dinner? lol

x3

THE LITTLE ENGINE THAT COULD

my first shopping trip went quite well with LatinLover. i got 2 pairs of shoes from aldo and over $100 worth of MAC make-up :) i got sooo freaking high tho before bc like ive mentioned before -he yaps my fucking ear off sometimes with all his crazy stories and antics and baggage -and plus i was kinda nervous since i was losing my SD shopping virginity lol. so i figured being stoned would help hehe... i felt kinda guilty but whatever i got my shoes and he got his sex so it was a win-win situation. i basically told him before we got started that i wanted to establish what i wanted... i told him some makeup from MAC and like 3 pairs of shoes (2 pairs of heels and some gladiator/strappy flats). we spent like over 2 hours trying to find flats with no success because my foot is so damn narrow so all the cute shoes were too wide. no worries tho -next time? we met up for lunch yesterday and had some amazinggg sushi -have yall ever had fatty tuna? it sounds gross but its like the best cut of the tuna and it was muy delicioso! he was talking about how so many people are unappreciative these days and how he does stuff for so many people without aksing for ne thing in return and i was like "umm i hope u are not indirectly referring to me.." and he said no and afterwards texted me reassuring he was in no way insinuating towards me and that i had shown my appreciation above and beyond. and sexually.. lol phew!

i also met that pot from SA i mentioned 2 posts ago. i am going to call him MrAll-Star... he used to play baseball in college and taught little league and just seems like he was an all-american type of guy in college.  we met at a sushi place... i liked that he just ordered whatever without caring about amount or price or anything.. we tried jellyfish -it was interesting to say the least...  the service sucked though but i made sure i didnt act like a whiney brat and bitch about it. when i went to the bathroom he texted me saying that i was hot and "where does he sign my contract?" to basically be in an arrangement with me.. i didnt see it til we said goodbye tho thankfully bc it would have felt awakward for me i think if i had seen it before we said our farewells lol. not much has happened since tho -its been over a week since our meet and we have kept in touch vaguely through text. he said he was willing to do a $500/week allowance -even if we didnt see eachother every week -the thing is tho we havent even seen eachother since our 1st meet so its been hard to really establish ne thing. i texted him today asking if he wanted to meet again this weekend and he said he texted me inviting me to a baseball game in our city and didnt hear back from me so had already made other plans... WELL thats bc i didnt get the freaking text. so i was like "if i dont respond back its bc i didnt get the text bc i will always text back". i was about to be like maybe we an arrangement between us is not going to work bc of our conflicting plans/schedules.. but i dont want to be hasty so im just gunna keep chugging along and hopefully will get some money to fill my sugar freight cars along this rocky SB track -blah x3

FOR LOVE? OR MONEY?

*sigh* these past few hours ive been thinking... and sometimes this can be a bad thing. that is why i like to be busy,busy,busy all the damn time... so i do not think and overanalyze things in my life. dont u hate when u cant fall asleep at night and lay there looking up at the ceiling thinking "what the hell am i doing? who the hell am i?" well i know i do sometimes at least... its nothing major like i need to be going to therapy or an asylum -just thoughts that normal human begins sometimes have i assume. right now im trying to figure out if -come summer time- i want to go back to the city my university is located in or stay in my hometown. the reason this is such a contemplative decision is the fact that the main reason i would want to go back to my university's city is so i can continue my relationship with my ex/"open relationship" bf who will be there as well taking classes. and the main reason i would want to stay within my hometown for the summer is so i can continue my sugar life... i just cannot be in a real bf/gf relationship and do the sugar thing as well. it is too emotionally-wearing and i just have waaaayyy too much of a guilty conscience so i would spill the beans about what i was doing eventually i know. this is when i like to turn to my go-to quote in times like this "whats meant to be... WILL be" and "everything works out in the end". lets hope that these words will remain steadfast. and the 2 questions remain: for love? or for money? x3

PS- i strongly encourage yall to look up this song: "In for the Kill (Skreams Lets Get Ravey Mix)" by La Roux. its quite sexy and perfect for the mood i am in now

LA DI DA

nothing too spectacular happening in my sugar world. MrDoolittle is still in another country, until next week i believe, and has been e-mailing me with pics and updates from his trip and reminding me of his interest in seeing me again when he returns.

i have a meeting with a new pot tomorrow afternoon for lunch. we met on SA and he will actually be the first guy i have met from that site... all my other men have been met through SD4Me... which is still not letting me log in to my account -argh! we talked briefly over the phone and he says he is a self proclaimed flirter over text... um okayyyy. he also said he wants me to be his SB intern and said he would explain what he means when we met. if it consists of me looking pretty and getting paid count me in! haha
he is in his early 40's, good-looking (according to his pics), and seems fairly knowledgable with the SD/SB thing. i told him to pick a restaurant to meet at tomorrow bc "i am unfamiliar with [city im currently living in] still". haha love using that line, takes the pressure off me to pick somewhere we both like -plus if its good food then they get a star in their SD grade book right off the bat ;)

im meeting LatinLover sunday for the 2 S's: shopping&sex of course.. hehe. it will be my first time being taken shopping and im going to try to get a few things ive put off buying with my own cash. im thinking 2-3 pairs of shoes from Aldo, some MAC make-up, and possibly a dress/bikini/lingerie (lingeire being his idea of course). im a bit nervous being i have never been taken shopping in order to get things so another person can purchase them for me, so im curious to see how comfortable i feel with the whole process -and nayways, gotta start somewhere!

i also played around in the CraigsList waters this week. i put up a post basically advertising the concept of someone being my SD and that i was looking for someone who was familiar with the idea or willing to learn. i got a few responses -before it was flagged and promptyly removed (hags) - replied to 2 men and my interest fizzled about 3 e-mails in. plus i was a bit creeped out by receiving e-mails from men who i have NO IDEA what they look like or who they are... im just going to stick with the sites specifically catered to us sugar eaters and givers hehe. until next time - BES0S x3

ROLLERCOASTER KIND OF WORLD

i swear -every time i think im getting the hang of this SB thing i see, do, or hear something that makes me question this whole entire thing. am i lowering my standards too much? am i attracting the wrong guys? do i need to go for older men? this is a trial and error process though and i must keep marching through.

i visited Mr.Mentor over the weekend to attend a black tie event. as i had mentioned before he owes me  a shopping trip but we never got around to it for the fact we were pressed for time (i flew in sat morning and left sun night) and were quite hungover from the event thanks to the open bar. this 2nd meeting was much more comfortable for me and he is more like a friend than a SD which i am beginning to wonder is more of a bad or good thing? bad for the fact i feel less comfortable asking for $$ for fear of appearing rude -good for the fact i am one of his top choices to bring to events, trips, etc bc of the ease in which we get along. he bought me a formal gown and new heels for the even and i left the freaking dress in his car!! ugh so mad about that one. then again though i am planning on visiting again.. this to ACTUALLY get my shopping in and then i will retrieve my new black, backless scrumtious gown.

Mr.Doolittle is out of town for the next 2 & 1/2 weeks which is fine with me for the fact my ex is visiting me soon and it will give me more availability to mingle with any new pots. we have established finally that he will give me $400/$500 per week/visit and though it seems quite transactional being handed money every time i leave our visits.. this is why i am doing what i am doing and he needs to keep this in mind too. we have not had sex yet and i plan on taking it very slow with him and want to be 100% that i will be receiving funds for my time before having to add another notch to my belt.

i also partied with LatinLover this past week -OMG had sooooo much fun at one of the clubs in the city im in. decided to invite him to meet me and the group i was there with just to keep me on his mind since i am still working on a day we both are free so he can take me shoe shopping. i am also planning on cutting off our meets after this soon-to-come shopping trip if he does not start giving me any type of monetary funds for my time and the gas needed to drive to his place. maybe i am a fool for continuing to see him as long as i have without being financially compensated (he has taken me to some good shows though) but i feel like once i get to go shopping it will make up for all of this... plus he is good looking so not too hard having to hang out with him besides.. the fact he fucking yaps my ear off about none other than who? -himself of course. ugh such a turn OFF.

 x3

oh yeah!.. one of my most go-to profiles on one of the SD/SB sites im on has been having technical difficulties so i have not been able to sign-in for over a week now! ugh time is a ticking and i need to find another pot Asap so sent in a complaint and hopefully will be back up and running soon.

ps- literally just got my order from victoria secret delivered to my door thanks to the gift card from Mr.Mentor. oh the sweet taste of sugar is just too yummy to give up lol.

SAY WHAT YOU MEAN

so i saw my ex/open relationship bf yesterday and it gave me a new perspective on what i am looking for from the sugar world. seeing him again made me realize how i love him so incredibly much and how hard it would ever be to find someone to even compare to what him and i have together... he is my best friend, lover, etc. and no one could come between that truely in my heart.

because of this i have decided to stop trying to pretend i have feelings for any of the SDs i have mentioned in the past and start being up front about what i want from this.. which is obviously money/an allowance. i e-mailed Mr.Doolittle about it and havent heard back and honestly i really could care less... theres plenty of other fish in the sea and if a SD does not feel confortable or like he is being used bc i ask for an allowance (um do u remember what type of site we met on!??!) then im glad i found out now rather than later after wasting valuable time.

so do not be surprised by old SDs dissappearing from my blog and new ones showing up (hopefully soon). this is still a learning process for me and im glad im getting closer to realizing what i want from this. also, if you have any advice or an opinion about what type of men are the best for giving allowances without u having to waste time making them think u like them beyond being an SD i would love to hear!  x3

NO WAY TO KEEP IT SHORT

though i still consider myself a newbie of the sugar world i am beginning to finally see the process that goes behind finding your ideal SD and the time and ups and downs that comes with all of it.

THE.RUSSIAN: so i finally heard back from him after sending him another e-mail once i saw that he had recently logged onto his SD4Me profile but had still neglected to fill my inbox with an explanation of his dissappearance. in a nutshell my email went like this 'you ask for my work schedule and i give it to you and i do not hear back? if u were looking for nothing other than a one-time thing just tell me... shame on u for never respodning back to my last e-mail'. he responded apologizing and said that once he saw that our schedules did not parallel and for the fact he will be leaving for business for weekends, soon he felt it would be too hard to meet consistenetly. ARGH!-there goes my easy $800! i just replied saying that if he ever has free time and wants to meet again to let me know. and. that. was. it... fuck. so on the bright side one less SD to make time for.. bleh.

MR.MENTOR: i am visiting him the last weekend of february to accomany him to a black tie event (or whatever its called). i really would not be going back again since i said before the only part i enjoyed about our sex was his mouth being down south but we made a bet for superbowl that if the saints won i would get a shopping trip on him and he would buy my ticket to vegas!!! *crosses fingers* also, he scored points because he sent me a V.S. gift card for $100 'to buy something for when i came up'. at this point we've essentially talked every day since our first meet so im interested to see how this 2nd trip will differ from the first. (UPDATE: i went to the gyno last week to get checked out for possibly having chlamydia/gonorrhea... if yall recall i got a yeast infection after having unprotected sex with Mr.Mentor and was freaking some. i have not gotten a call back confirming anything positive showed up so it's 80% sure that im clean still unless they call today or something!)

MR.DOOLITTLE: ugh!!! so frustrated with this one. after going to his house for dinner/movie night i decided we get along well enough so i texted him a few days after to mention the allowance thing. i told him basically i enjoy his company, etc. but cannot continue investing time with him if has no plans to finacially assist me.. hence the reason im even on the SD sites (duh!!!). he concurred and said he would be willing to give me $$ every time we met. well i went to his house again on v-day (he got me red roses... cute but im not ur fucking gf) and we decided that this upcoming Sat we're going to get high with eachother (lol he hasnt smoked in forever!) and take his boat out with his dog and enjoy the FL weather. well when im leaving finally im making faces to myself thinking okay heres the part where he is suppose to give me the money.. we walk to my car and he hands me a $100 bill saying its for the pot im going to get us... UMMM OKAYYY -and where is MY personal money to use?!? omg i was so pissed driving back b/c he better not think that that counts towards $$ for an allowance. hell to the no! so i decided i will get us a small amount of weed (to be able to keep most of the $100 for moi) and i'll hang out with him sat, get high -eat good food -go tanning on the boat... then be up front and say this will be the last time we see eachother. when he asks why i will say - I NEED FUCKING MONEY! (in a much more polite, yet affirmative way) and give him one last chance to hand me to dough right there and then. if not -goodbye doolittle.

LATIN.LOVER: saw him again after 2 weeks on the night before v-day. he made pizza and we watched a movie and he gave me a full body massage then had sex (i won the massage with him in a superbowl bet as well). he is taking me to see La Nouba (yay!) this saturday night (doolittle will be during the day hehe). he also got me this neglige set from VS that was sooo not my style (some black, opened top and g-string with weird asian prints on it..wtf). i keep trying to figure out the pro's and con's with this guy to fig out if i want to continue seeing him. PROS: attractive, cooks for me, takes me to shows, has promised me shopping soon. CONS: do not like his dick size, talks wayyy too much, has major baggage (dead fiancee, etc), has never shelled out $$ to me for even just gas. im trying to hang in there until we go shopping to see how generous he is and atleast get a new pair of shoes outta him and im looking forward to the show sat night. if we have not gone shopping by mid-march then screw it and him (and in a non-literal way too!).

MR.SOUTHERN: met him for an early dinner sunday before i saw Mr.Doolittle and it was such a good date! : ) i actually laughed to the poibnt of tears which has never happened on a first meet. he's super, duper tall so i could def where heels with him and very, very easy going and has a great smile. i did feel a bit strange though after the date like something was off and got my explanation for why last night. when i was at work he texted me saying he sent me an e-mail that i would find "interesting". so when i got home i read it and it was basically him telling me how he did 3 little tests to see how real i was and if i was what he is looking for from a SB. for example: on the date he asked me what i had done/been given by past SDs and i quickly responded it was my business and no one elses. in the e-mail he said he greatly appreciated that and wants to make sure he will not be pusuing anything with a SB who is going to be telling his business to other people, etc. so apparently i passed with flying colors and said he wants to meet again when he is back in my city (he is for business so will be in and out a lot). i would love to see him again and am anxious to see what type of financial assistance i can possibly get from this guy.

TURK: i will no longer write about him because for one, my posts are just way too fucking long with all the pots/SDs i have on my radar, and two, he is not a SD and i will accept that and not waste further time trying to change him into one. the end.

x3

TOO MANY POTS & NOT ENOUGH SDs

quick updates here on my waaayyyy too many SDs -im so ready to narrow this pot list down to like 2 daddys and just enjoy them... i do like all the attention i get with having this many men on my radar but its just exhausting sometimes trying to make time for all of them:

THE.RUSSIAN: figured he was my 1 of 2 definite SDs.. we were suppose to meet sunday but had to reschedule.. he asked me for my work schedule this week which i sent him thursday and i have not heard back from him! -ugh. i have checked his profile tho on the site we met on and it says he has not logged in for 3 days which is around the time i replied back to his e-mail, so im thinking he is either (a) busy/out of town or (b) caught by the wifey? no idea... what i do know tho is i better hear from him soon because another 800 bucks sounds good right now.

MR.MENTOR: made a bet with him that if the saints won the superbowl he would take me shopping and buy my ticket to vegas... well THEY WON! so now im debating about booking a flight to see him in 2 or 3 weeks so he can follow through with the shopping part. i just am not fond of the idea of having sex with him again (its not bad he's just heftier like ive mentioned before which im kind of shallow about).

MR.DOOLITTLE: havent mentioned him since our first meet because i was thinking i was going to kick him to the curb BUT since things with LatinLover are not as ideal as i was hoping i decided to meet with him again to talk business, aka. how much he's willing to give me in allowance. im going to his house tonight to have dinner and meet his dog, blablabla. we'll see what happens -he is super nice too and has a boat and motorcycle so he would be good for the weekends? lol

LATIN.LOVER: texts me every day... said he had a dream about me yesterday -kind of strange but atleast im on his mind even when he's sleeping haha. rght when i was coming to the conclusion he wasnt SD material (as in not generous enough) i popped the 'shopping' question and he was very obliging about it. unfortunately he said he cant take me until the weekend after valentines so i'll have to wait around until then. whatever atleast he's attractive and we get along well... maybe i'll convince him to take me to another show in the mean time.

NEW SDs:
MR.SOUTHERN: he is going to be in and out of the city im currently living in and we are planning on meeting for lunch this thursday (actually just got off the phone with him about it). stats on him: he's young... 30 i believe... and i already told him that im wary of his SD potential bc of this, so he already knows he better prove himself quick. he also has the cutest southern accent (hence his incognito name) which im typically not fond of since i have a bit of one myself -but im really digging his... hopefully he has the looks to match it (seen pics of him that were cute but u know how that goes sometimes lol).

TURK: not really an SD because i met him through a friend NOT a site so he's prob a waste of my time but i figured if i dont have anything else better to do he can fill up some of my time. he's turkish, hot (dark hair, greenish eyes, olive skin), younger (33?), has $$$, and is free during the days which i like since i work nights and have been bored sometimes during the afternoons. im meeting him tomorrow to go work out (yes work out i said! lol) then lay out by his pool. pretty random i know but its something to do and i could use a little sweaty panting without the whole intercourse part hahaha.

SUGAR ON MY TONGUE, TONGUE

i have found my SD everyone. thats right -less than 1 month into my hunt and i found my kill. [EDIT: never will i say this again bc right after this post TheRussian goes M.I.A.... oh the curse of the blog lol.]

THE.RUSSIAN: we met at a hotel sunday afternoon like planned. i was super nervous at first but right when i got there his sexy accent and down-to-earth, gentle demeanor put me at ease. i was COMPLETELY at ease when i walked into the room and there was a swarvoski gift bag on the table. he told me he had bought me something as a gift and it was this beautiful pendant necklae laced in the swarvoski crystals -so my style too which was even more impressive. we talked some, did the deed... twice (both times lasting less than 2min LOL... whatever) and inside my swarvoski bag was an envelope with $800. i emailed him the day before we met telling him that i expect him to be giving me $$ bc he enjoys my company and that it is a gift from him to me and that it is NOT payment for sexual favors, etc. he told me he understands and respects that and does not want to offend me by making it seem like that type of scenario. we are going to meet again this sunday.

LATIN.LOVER: omg! sat night we went out to a club downtown and i got so freaking trashed... i ended up puking all over me and my little black dress in his sports car. apaprently i opened the car door to finish outside of it while he was driving! lmao. he was sweet tho and cleaned me up and washed my dress for me.. still so embarrassing tho omg!! note to self: do not drink down triple vodkas and tonic like it is water. it kinda sucked bc he had connections for me to get into 2-3 21&up clubs, but all of those fell through once we were out -so we ended up having to stay at this 18&up club he nevers really goes to. we ended up having sex too and holy shit his dick is so freaking thick and not that long which is like the opposite of what i prefer. like im talking, i felt sore afterwards thick. its a shame too bc i was looking forward to him being my designated fuck buddy daddy but now that ive test driven the car i dont know if i want to continue an invest in it.

so now im at the point where i will be keeping TheRussian around (obviously!) and possibly finding a substitute for LatinLover unless he decides to give me some cash or take me shopping bc i havent seen either yet.. and making me dinner and paying for my drinks when i go out with him isnt going to cut it for much loger.

ALSO! one of the fellow blogging SBs and i met up friday night. i even got to meet her SD! he paid for our delicious dinner at cheesecake factory and gave me some good advice for my SD hunting as well. theyre so cute together :) hehe -promise im not trying to embarass u girl. until next time chicas x3

LOTS OF POT DATES

i have been so busy lately omg! mostly with training for work and meeting pot SDs.

MR.ROCKER: called me back after i said in the last post i had emailed him and hadnt heard back so i was thinking he went MIA. apparently my email went to his 'spam' folder so he called me yesterday hoping to get together again soon. im starting to focus on finding a SD closer and more local and Mr.Rocker lives in my hometown which i am not living at right now.

MR.DOLITTLE:: had our first meet sat night. took me to a nice restaurant -got scallops, salad, and yummy chocolate dessert. he's a senior VP of a bank, has a boat, jeep, BMW, and motorcycle so might be fun -he seems a little on the soft side as in i could use him (not looking to do that tho! i really respect the whole MUTUAL aspect of these arrangements).

LATIN.LOVER: he cooked me a freaking 5-course dinner sun night and is taking me to see one of my fave theater shows tomorrow night :) he tried to kiss me when i left and i turned my head and said "cheek only" hehe. from what he has told me, he has lived in L.A., NYC, and europe before (speaks italian and spanish -so sexy with his deep ass voice) and was telling me about his past rendezvous's so im trying to play a bit hard to get -since im sure he's used to getting the snatch right away lol. side note on him tho: he was freaking engaged in the past and his fiance (AND unborn child) died in the 9-11 attacks! he also has a lot of past drama with health and TONS of stories about what has happened to him in the past and its a little much -im very NONbaggage/simple-life and i feel like he has a lot of past drama/crazy shit...it makes me feel like we are 2 COMPLETELY diff people so makes me wonder how far this will go. do any of u girls ever have that problem feeling like a SD is so much more experienced than u with life events that its almost intimidating??

THE.RUSSIAN: my new FAVORITE!! :D him and i met for an early dinner today. i felt at ease right away and he's so cute and easy-going and has the sexiest russian accent. reason why he's my 'favorite': he gave me an envelope with $200 in it and this was our first meet. that has never happened yet to me so i was very pleased that he seems to be experienced with what this whole SD/SB thing is really about -the $$$$$ (about damn time!). he emailed me saying he was impressed by my intellect, beauty, etc and wants to meet possibly in a more 'private' setting and i emailed him back asking exactly what he means (tho i have a pretty good idea..lol). he is married so i guess he wants something discreet and im hoping to make him a regular SD that could finally be the outlet to that allowance ive been wanting!

"patience is a virtue"... hope its true! off to bed . 630am work shift tomorrow -ugh. nighty-night x3

LIVIN' LA VIDA LOCA

well i am all settled in *insert city i am doing internship at* finally. i already hate the job they have me doing tho and have already day dreamed about convincing a pot SD to buy me an apartment and give me an exceptional allowance just so i can stay in this city but not have to work... keep dreaming -i know lol. plus i always know u must have a back-up job for income to avoid ever having to rely on a SD to pay bills bc theyre wayyy too UNreliable. okay so now on to updates, updates, updates!

-OLD SD's (aka. SDs Already Mentioned in Past Posts)-
MR.MENTOR: i still havent went to the gyno yet to get checked after having unprotected sex with him (*tisktisk*) but did ask him about when he got tested last and he said Oct and he was clean, etc. i took meds for a yeast infection and ever since havent had issues but still plan on getting checked. we text every day and he has drunk-texted me twice basically saying he "adores" me and wants me to come back and visit. we'll see..

LATINLOVER: my new addiction. had our first date on thursday and totally hit it off -he has this amazing, deep, sexy voice too. he called me like 5min after i left our lunch date and said he wanted to cook me dinner. i was like um YES u can cook me a 5 course dinner, plus some amazing chocolate dessert. he just texted me to confirm im still coming; im going to his place tomorrow night for this yummy dinner/dessert. like i said in my first post about him, he has told me up-front he's looking for someone quite sexual BUT i plan on not sleeping with him until our next date (if all goes well tmrw night that is). he said he wants to bring me to go see the phantom of the opera this week after i mentioned to him that i love the theater at lunch -sweetness.

MR.ROCKER: he lives in my hometown that i just left. i sent him an email like 3 days ago just to keep our flame ignited, telling him to call me sometime, but no call or response since, so whatever -maybe i'll see him again when i go back home.


-NEW SD's (Never Mentioned Before)-
MR. DOLITTLE: i have a date with him tonight. i call him 'dolittle' bc he's like obsessed with his dog, lol. whatever im a huge animal-person myself. i talked to him over the phone telling him we needed to re-schedule for tonight and his voice is so freakin' high (not like gay sounding just def not manly). i almost wanted to bail out on seeing him altogether after meeting LatinLover, but figured if at the least i'll get a free dinner out of our meet haha.

THE.RUSSIAN: from europe, sexy accent, married, "36 (so he says)". thats really it for now -trying to make a dinner date with him for this week.


PS- the ambassador i mentioned in a few posts back is being postponed. he's really old and filthy rich so i know i should be putting more effort towards meeting him, but he lives a bit far and im still not ready to date a man old enough to be my grandfather!

x3